Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Ragnar Racing Tip #4: Van Ettiquette

Spending 30 hours in a van with six other people? Worried that your physical and emotional stench will offend your van-mates? Well, here are a few handy tips to help you through this difficult, and possibly smelly time.

1. Wearing a shirt like the one below will not make you any friends, especially if you've just eaten a bean and cheese burrito. Keep it van appropriate people!

2. Ragnar is a silly event, let's be honest. We are constantly surrounded by idiots dressed up in weird costumes, face paint, vans that look like giant turtles, and out-of-state Coastie Dan types who show up and steal our thunder. One of the worst things you can do is show up looking like a complete moron, like the gentleman pictured below (for the record I dressed like that for a work thing). Keep it real people.

On the other hand, wearing shorty shorts, no shirt, and a cape is awesome.

3. Craig's #1 pet peeve - Hearing other people chew. For reelz people, chew with your mouth shut. If you don't you might get slapped in the mouth. Also, stinky food, even if you like it, can be offensive. Be careful what you eat. Pickled squid is just a big No-No.

4. While snuggling, spooning, and general comfort circle filtration is often discouraged - especially since most all of us a married folk - when you are spending that much time in a van together it may be appropriate, at times. However, let's keep it gender appropriate. Boy-Girl is going to spread rumors and cause problems. Coastie, since you are the only other guy in the van besides myself, why don't you just plan on cuddling up for some warmth. It's ok,  I don't bite.

5. Finally, each of us will be sleeping at different times. I fully feel it is ok to mess with someone when they sleep. The rule here is simple - NO PERMANENT MARKER! Outside of that pretty much anything goes.
This is my friend Scott. I mess with him just about every time we take a road trip. 

Hey gang, see you in like 3 days! Hahahaha.